Breast Torture Ramblings

My breasts are almost this size

My breasts seem to get tortured a lot. The pain is integral to my bondage experiences, and my boobs more than their fair share.

When I am subbing and letting a dom have their way, the point behind the entire scene is to relinquish control, to be bound so there is literally nothing I can do but just take it. To endure. The bondage is the point, the focus, the kink. I want to feel the restriction, the struggle, the pain urging me to get free and run, but being completely unable to do so. 

Pain is your body informing your brain and the rest of your mind that something in your body is being damaged (or about to be damaged) and urging you to do whatever it takes to stop that damage. It is a direct connection to the brain saying, run like hell. Beg, run, escape, pull back, do whatever it takes to stop the damage. The worse the pain, the greater the urge to do something to stop it. Self preservation.

Because my kink is to be tied up, disabled, secured in such a way that I can not escape, then anything that makes me want to escape even more enhances my sense of helplessness and directly feeds my kink.

So when I am tied up and experience pain, my mind wants to get free. But I can't. I am most helpless, most at someone else's mercy when they are invoking pain.

Tie my boobs purple

So I don't actually like pain, but it does trigger what I do enjoy about being restrained-- the feeling of helplessness.

So yeah, my breasts are sort of on the larger side. Not huge, but big enough every dom sees them and immediately wants to play with them. Pretty much guaranteed.

Oh goody! Let's tie them up!

Honestly, having my boobs tied up tightly so they bulge like balloons is humiliating to me. I hate it. Binding my breasts usually doesn't hurt too much unless the tie is especially tight; though they can ache after a while. Blood flow is restricted. But having my boobs tied is first humiliating, and secondly a harbinger of nasty things to come. 

Because guys can't just let bulging, bulbous tied boobs alone. 

Breast bondage really gets to me mentally, because it is embarrassing, I feel deformed and humiliated by my soft breasts being manipulated and tied to make them look completely different and weird. And of course I know the guy is going to start in on them any moment.

Anticipation is one of the worst (and best) things in a good session.

It seems as if my boobs have more options for torture than any other area of the body. I am amazed by this, but it is true. There's a lot of stuff that can happen to those two soft bulbous extremities on my chest.

Nipple clamps are perhaps the most standard method of torture for women out there. I've had my nipples clamped more times than... well, I have no idea. But they always get clamped in conjunction with some sort of sexual situation and quite frequently they are clamped when I am being directly sexually stimulated.

Large binder clamps, applied behind nipples

The result? Clamped nipples are now associated with sexual arousal. Put a nipple clamp on me now and I get wet. Cause and effect. It just happens. 

There are lots of clamps types out there. Clothespins are easy; paper binder clips, the big black ones designed to hold larger stacks of paper, are the nastiest, most painful things. I fucking hate those. I had one dom that used those repeatedly and they damaged my nipples so they were bleeding long after the session. So much so I had to call a halt to nipple play for several months to make sure everything healed.

Binder clamps applied on nipple

Those paper binder clips seem to get used a lot because everyone has them laying around. The larger ones aren't as painful. The smaller ones are tighter and can cause me to break down and begin begging for mercy and willing to do any fucking thing they want to get them off.

Of course, where you put the clamp matters a lot. Most of the time the clamp goes on my nipple area but is pushed back a way, so it comes down and presses on the areola or even a little further back. That's a lot easier to take and with something gentler like a clothespin can actually not hurt hardly at all.

Clamping the actual nipple, like, the protruding small nipple and not the areola behind, that hurts a lot worse. Again, do that with some of those binder clips and I will be begging, truly begging to get them off. Want a BJ? ATM? DP? No problem just take them off!

A couple of times guys have told me to pull them off myself. That is fucking cruel. I mean, the process of pulling nipple clamps off is fucking painful, especially tight ones. It's sort of a predicament bondage situation, you know? You can leave the clamps on and let them hurt. The pain will slowly go dull, but you know that's not good because the blood flow has ended to the nipples and that's why you can't feel the pain as sharply. So you gotta get those clamps off.

But then, do you go through the pain immediately, the double or tripple the pain to pull them off yourself? Or just wait it out? 

And what if you pull it off and he laughs and just puts them right back on, all that self inflicted pain for nothing? Yes, I've had that happen. 

Doms can be bastards.

The other main kind of nipple clamp I've had used on me (besides the guys that buy actual clamps made to be nipple clamps), are skirt hangars. Those aren't used as much because guys don't have skirt hangers laying around. But they are common enough.

Skirt hanger with handy hook for added pain

Those can be fucking painful as well (depending on the hanger), and they are perfect for hanging weights from. The clamps on skirt hangers need to be relatively tight so the material doesn't slip out. which makes them painful.

The real problem with hanger clamps is they have a ready made hook for hanging things on. For pulling, stretching, distending my poor abused nipples.

Yes, weights can actually amplify the pain quite a bit, and it doesn't take much to do it. Anything pulling on clamped nipples hurts worse.

There are enough household items that work quite well as nipple clamps there doesn't seem to be much reason to actually buy custom nipple clamps, but there are lots of different clamps designed specifically to cause my nipples pain. I've had a few of them applied over the years.

Clover clamps with chain and weights

I won't go over them all, because frankly there are too many types. Basically, it all boils down to how hard is the pinching tension (adjustable ones usually can be adjusted to high levels of pain) and how large is the surface. Clamps that have minimal surface area are bound to bring tears to my eyes (much to the enjoyment of my dom, usually).

Oh, and again-- any clamp that can take weights will increase the pain quite a bit, thus the chain on many pro clamps (though a hanger does just as well).

I've never used a safe word with nipple clamps, though I have decided not to allow certain types after wearing them for a while. Any clamp that has teeth is a non-starter.

Another favorite activity of doms in love with my boobs-- beating them raw. 

If I am going to be whipped, I prefer my back. It seems to take it better. Next would be my ass and upper thighs. From there we go to more sensitive areas, and the breasts are one of my least favorite places to be flogged. Which also means it is my dom's most favorite place to flog me. 

The right way to cane breasts

If you are going to flog my tits, tie me down because I will move. I will wriggle and wrestle and try to get them out of the way and that's just the facts. 

Can't help it. I am not into just standing and taking it. I will do my best to get away. That's fundamental. So tie me down, tie my tits in place, bracket them, do whatever it takes because I will not sit still for a boob flogging.

Strangely, most doms I've been with don't do that. They will  tie my wrists up over my head or something easy like that, then try to cane my boobs. Then wonder why they can't actually hit them that often. 

The best way is to lock my breasts down. Hardly anyone does that (maybe most don't have the equipment). 

The second way is to just whip the entire front of my body, which will get my boobs. I hate this, actually, because it is inaccurate and quite often the whip will strike my nipples. And yes, the nipples are much more sensitive to the pain from a single tail whip. Again, enough I will beg for it to stop (if my mouth is free, that is).

Tits get a beating all too often

One of my limits is no welts, cuts, bleeding, etc., where it can be seen if I am wearing street clothes. That means the breasts are a prime location to try and indulge in creating some nice raw red welts.

There's not much more I can say about beating my tits. Get them immobile unless you are just whipping everything in the area and don't care about accuracy. Hitting the nipples is in fact a lot more painful. The rest is general principles for canes, floggers and whips that apply to any area of my body. 

OK... so... I told you there's a lot of stuff that can and does happen to my poor boobs. We can go on.

Needles. Needles can go a lot of places in the body but the breasts are the best place to use them. Why? Because they are just big blobs of soft tissue. Needles don't actually do a lot of damage there. Other places, needles might go through muscle or tendons other body components you would rather not hit. 

A hard limit for me

But breasts? Oh my god, they are just made for needles. Small ones, big ones, short ones, long ones. 

Yeah, there's a whole kink involving nailing breasts (I won't allow that because it will scar and there is a much higher chance of infections, so it's a hard limit). I can't see me ever doing something like that. Nope.

I will confess. I would like to make needles a hard limit. I hate them, they are psychologically difficult for me to take. Seeing them beforehand, watching them go in, it makes me feel like having a breakdown.

But my own rules won't allow me to do that. My hard limit rules say I will do anything that doesn't harm me long term, that will heal quickly, and has little or no risk. 

Needles can draw blood and hurt and are psychologically quite distressing, but the hole left by them heals really fast and completely. And in the breasts, they won't do permanent damage. Heck, needles are used all the time-- we go get blood drawn at the docs all the time, so I have no excuse to ban them from active scenes.

So yeah, I get needles in the breasts. I wrote a post (you can look it up) describing the first time I got needles in my boobs. It was traumatizing, mostly because of my own fear. 

Needles can hurt but to be honest they hurt less than a lot of other things. There's a sharp sort of burning pain when they first go in, but that fades quickly and is gone (for the most part). Unless the dom wiggles them, in which case I curse at him and he generally will stick another needle in my breasts to remind me who is in control and not to curse.

There's a limit to how large a gauge needle I will take, but just about any medical grade needle is OK. Well, not OK, I hate them, I will beg ahead of time for the dom to not use them. I'll promise to let him fuck me or to give him the best blow job ever, or let him fuck me in the ass, or whatever he wants. Just don't do the needles.

Never just one needle sigh

Begging doesn't usually work because the dom knows he can fuck me anyway when I am tied up.

Because needles hurt going in, but once in they tend to not hurt any more, there's always multiple needle. The whole process is very mental, very mind-game. The slow process of binding my breasts, of making sure I am secure and can't move around too much. Swabbing the breasts with alcohol to make sure there are no infections. Getting out the needles, playing with them, letting me see them as they are prepared. Watching them get swabbed. It can take forever and I am in tears by the time my dom gets to my breasts and plumps them and decides where the first needle with go... then changes his mind and goes to the other breast...

Finally the first needle goes in and I cringe and wriggle but there is nothing I can do. I am helpless and he's going to do this to me. If I am lucky he will massage my clit while he is slowly inserting the needles.

If I make too much noise during the procedure he will gag me. I hate/love being gagged. But I am never blindfolded. I must be able to see what is happening. 

Only one there

Oh-- one thing I do sort of put a restriction on is needles directly through the nipples. I do this because if I didn't, every guy would spend an hour ramming 20 needles into my nipple (it hurts a lot more there and they just like it). I am afraid of creating scar tissue and causing damage to my nipples, so I've generally said no to more than one needle in a nipple.

We aren't nearly done with all that my doms have done to my poor breasts. I wasn't kidding when I said that guys like to torture breasts more than any other part of the body. Even more than my pussy or ass. 

Electrical has become a preferred method of torture in just about all situations, including real torture at the hands of the police or whoever happens to want to break you. Most torture methods, ways of invoking pain in a BDSM scene, are lighter, kinder versions of torture that has been or is used to destroy people.

We play with strappado, bastinado, whippings, burning (e.g. hot wax). And we play with electricity, which is favored because it can really fucking hurt and still leave the victim in relatively good shape. And it is controllable. 

Doms like to put electrodes on various areas of the body, and the most popular places are inside the rectum, inside the vagina, and on the nipples. Yes, sometimes the sticky electrodes get place on the breasts themselves. That's actually better (not good, it can hurt like hell), than the nipples.

But no, the vast majority of the time a dom will clamp the electrodes right to my nipples and fire away.

There's a variety of things that directly effect the pain delivered by the electrodes, and the strength of the shock is only one of them.

The reason everyone loves shocking the nipples (my nipples) is because they are, in fact, a lot more sensitive. Certain areas of the body are in fact more sensitive than others. I've found my rectum (inside my ass), my vagina, and my nipples to be the most sensitive areas. A shock that is mildly uncomfortable on my hips or buttocks will cause me to squirm and scream on my nipples or up my ass.

Also, there's the conductivity of the skin area, usually because of moisture. If the electrodes have conductive gel or are wet (such as with body fluid inside my rectum), the shock is a lot more... effective. That means painful.

Shocks can be short and intense, or longer and less intense. Most TENS units have different modes, and often they cycle between a lower and higher intensity. So it always hurts, but will get worse for a bit, then ease off.

Nipple electrodes

Lower intensity shocks feel sort of tingly, and also give the sensation of pressure (weirdly enough). Most significant shocks will turn into a burn, eventually becoming extremely painful, sort of like something extremely hot has been pressed up against my flesh. 

There are two ways to set up electric nipples. One, clamp a positive electrode to one nipple, the negative to the other. The electricity runs from one nipple to the other, across the chest. Yeah, I know, this is awful, everyone says this is extremely dangerous because it can impact heart rhythm. 

Shock runs through the nipple

So the second method-- clamp the nipple with a positive electrode on top and the negative below, on the same nipple. That way the electricity runs through the nipple but not across the chest. 

For some reason, doms don't do this often. I think the main reason is laziness. It is so much easier to just clamp the two electrodes on the two nipples then watch me squirm and beg.

Either way hurts like hell.

One of the most excrutiating electrical pains I had was when I was tied up very security and had a positive and negative electrode clamped to my nipple (above and below). It was giving me irritating shocks that made me make faces, but it wasn't too bad.

Then the dom inserted two bare electrodes up my ass. Remember how the rectum is one of those moist
places inside the body that conducts really well? Yeah, well when he turned on the second TENS driving the wires up my ass, 

Well, the damn circuit completed between the positive electrode in my ass, and the negative one on my nipple and it felt like my ass and my right nipple were on fire. I jerked, tensed, screamed. I mean, a real scream (those happen sometimes). 

I screamed a couple of times before he pulled the wires out of my ass and things calmed down a bit. That taught me (and him) to be a little more aware of how electricity can flow.

There is one kind of breath torture I've never experienced, and it is a little strange I haven't. I think it is a big fetish with a lot of doms, but I think it is also something they are a little afraid of because they don't understand it and are afraid of body damage. I do respect that.

Being suspended by the breasts/

OK, I've had weight put on bound breasts before, but having 140 lbs of me suspended by those blobs of flesh on my chest? OK, if the situation arose it would probably fall within my limits and yes, I would allow it. 

Hanging by breasts

Well, OK, I'd been tied up and unable to do anything about it, which is the whole point, so it isn't like I would allow it so much as just endure it. But it could happen. But hasn't.

I have talked with a couple of women that have done it, and apparently it doesn't hurt as much as you might think. The sensation (which I've had before but not to that extent) is the feeling that your breasts, these two large bulbous blobs on your chest, might just be pulled off. The ropes are secured near the chest, behind most of the fatty breast tissue, so your boobs are put under a lot of pressure like balloons. Then when you go up in the air, it's like, you are floating, completely helpless in the air, and your boobs are stretching the flesh on your sides, under your arms, and there's pain but it isn't like, too awful.

Like I say, it might happen to me some day, but not yet. I don't ever talk about it in front of my dom because that is a sure fire way to make something happen.

I've been rambling here for a while. This wasn't a story like I usually do, just sort of some memories and thoughts about how obsessed guys seem to be about abusing my boobs.

What triggered this? Well, after a long hiatus away from my dom (personal life reasons), we got back together again and had a sort of date. But he had something special for my date.

Tack Bra Insert

A tack bra.

One of those things. Now, these are more common than you might think, partly because you can make them relatively easily. Get a bra, stick some tacks through it, get some poor woman to put it on.

I am sort of a perfect victim for the tack bra because my boobs are larger. The whole principle behind the tack bra is that it needs to have some pressure on it to actually push the tacks against the breasts. You can buy a bra that is too small, but that doesn't help too much. The key is to have big breasts (like mine) that actually need and use the bra for support. That way the tacks actually get pushed against the flesh.

Tack bras cause mild pain, but don't penetrate

You can't just buy a bra and shove tacks through it though. Do that, and the tacks just come out right away. They have to be secured in some way. There are two ways to do this-- first, you can use fabric glue to actually secure the tacks to the fabric. 

Second, you can use an insert, put the tacks through that and then put the insert into the bra. The bra then actually keeps the tacks in place and pushing against the breast skin.

Thing is about a tack bra, they don't work that well. Yes, they are uncomfortable. I went on the date with my dom, and he loved playing with me and snapping my bra straps and pressing my boobs with his hands, knowing it was driving the tacks in deeper. But that's it. They are no fun, but most tack bras are just that and nothing more-- uncomfortable. 

It's because tacks aren't sharp enough to actually penetrate the flesh. So yeah, it hurts, but it isn't bad enough we couldn't finish dinner together. My dom and me. 

When the date was over we went back to his place and he played with my breasts a little more. When he took the bra off my boobs had marks on them, but nothing had penetrated. It meant I was unhappy, I was distracted and uncomfortable (even in mild pain) during the entire evening because my clothes were designed to hurt me, but it could have been much worse.

So how do you make a tack bra really hurt? Wanna bring tears to my eyes and see fear in them?

Two ways. First, don't just have me wear the bra. Press them against my breasts. Have me lay down on my stomach, forcing me to lay on my breasts. Get some weight on them. That will drive the tacks in, and a lot of them will penetrate. I've had that done and it hurts and I will cry and I will beg you to let me up... only to have you push me down again because you like to see me cry.

Second, don't use tacks. Use needles. My dom has developed a fascination with lancets-- these are very small, short needles that are used to prick fingers when taking blood samples. They are very sharp and because they are very small you can embed them or glue them to things.

This terrifies me. Those lancets will penetrate the skin immediately, with little pressure. It will be like having dozens of needles all rammed into my flesh all at once.

I think he's working on a needle bra for me. If he wants me to wear one my only request is that I be completely bound and unable to move when he puts it on me.

More terrifying is that I think he may be working to develop some sort of bar or saddle or wooden pony with lancet needles. This gives me nightmares. I don't want that. I'd consider using a safe word, but I think it doesn't fall outside my limits. I'm scared. Truly.

OK, that's all the rambling for now.